Allen

allen is a state of mind.
a fixed ratio of hatred, distributed in short phrases (I hate this f...k sun! All those bloody f....ing idiots!)
an extreme caution in throwing anything away - most often resulting in shocking discovery of life forms in the fridge.
the owner of beethoven house where people either lingered or which they simply avoided.
if ever seen doing a split on the floor with a painful expression flapping his arms around - it would most probably be a dying swan.
it took him over 25 years to perfect his porridge - which resulted in purely addictive bowlfuls of creamy delicacy.